Beware of the Dentist

Before this visit in June the last time I had a dental appointment was around 1985 at school. A traumatic event that was, a nice young female dentist kneeling on my chest, yes I know this sounds nice for a young boy. But she was trying with all her force to pull healthy teeth, I just needed more room in my mouth.

Well in June a tooth blew up, bits flying everywhere, and no amount of pills could kill the pain. I bit the bullet, it would have been less painfull, and booked an apointment in Portobello. To say I was scared is an under-estimate, but I went. Having to go wasn't as easy as opening your mouth, I had to out myself, so lots of documents and explain I'm on benefits as well. Anxiety levels where very high that morning. Alas, paperwork went very well, even though I still needed to pay, seems if you are unemployed you get everything free, if you are ill you pay!! Can't quite get my mind round this, but hayho.

As I sat waiting for my dentist to call me, I was stunned when an elder lady with a crutch called my name. My think was what have I done I'm getting a cripple to poke things in my mouth, lets exit stage left, damn too slow, I'm led to the torture chain. Ann the dentist says to me "You are unlucky this morning getting the old moaning bitch", well I was stunned, but liked the style. She was very caring and also said "The door is there and you can go at anytime". Cool I could get out of this, anyways as the prodding continued Ann said I needed 2 fillings and my gums where not in a good state. Not bad for 26 years, I was really pleased. She did some scaling, which must have been hard as I kept my mouth shut, and I got 1 filling as well. End of appointment and i'm thinking don't need to be back here again for a long time, but no the immortal words, you'll need to book an appointment for tomorrow for the other filling, damn damn damn!

The following morning, a little less stressful as I know what is coming. This time was the DRILL, yuck the smell of burning foaming from my mouth, and right up my nose. Get me out of here thoughts again, but wow it was over. Yet again Ann drops the bombshell, you'll need to book an appointment for tomorrow so she could file it down, will this never end? Yes the next day, it's filed and cool, defianately not coming back for more torture, but she drops the bomb again, see you tomorrow for a scaling again. Four visits to a dentist in a week, this is not good, I've managed 26 years!! And this torture has cost me alot of money!

Move forward 4 weeks and well toothache, it was so bad I had to call NHS24, advised to take painkillers, none around on a Friday night so a car trip to Mum's at 11pm. Still sore on Monday so of we go to see Ann, well the caring woman said to me"Told you your gums are in a bad way", ha ha ha, more filing of the filling so it didn't put pressure on the one above. Ann says " Book your check-up", I replied "Yes for the year 2036", a chuckle was recieved from Ann.

Then at the end of October, toothache again. Why is it once you visit a dentist you end up never away from them, it's just not fair. This time gum disease, and the caring sharing Ann gives me pills to kill the infection, great not alot of prodding around. For some reason she smiles, I leave get in the car and go for the pills, the chemist tells me "No drinking with these pills". They always say that, get home read the leaflet, check google and there is defianately no drinking with these pills. They give them to drunks to get them off booze, touch booze and you throw up. Brilliant, it's my birthday weekend!!!!!! I hate birthdays, but they are ok with a beer or wine, I have coffee and diet Irn-bru.

43th birthday is certainly one to remember.

I see Ann tomorrow (Monday) for my check-up. Wish me luck>