Tuesday, 29 November 2011

A Transsexual, A Squirrel & Nuts

One of todays questions,

Where do squirrels store their nuts?

Where is this leading?

Squirrels collect and store nuts so they'll have food to last through winter. That thriftiness benefits more than just the squirrel—it helps the trees, too. That's according to Rob Swihart, a wildlife ecologist at Purdue University. Nuts clearly are dependent on either gravity or animals for dispersal. Squirrels are one of the most important species in this regard.

Ok, I asked this question, because I thought it was in their sack, or pocket! I know very uneducated, and there are loads of squirrels in Edinburgh.

Last night as I was watching television, in my usual position of lying on the couch, there was a huge ouch from my grion area as I got up. And this raised the second question of today .........................

Where does a transsexaul hide their nuts?

For visitors from abroad, "nuts" is a slang term for testicles. Just so we are thinking the same.

The first Google search came up with this.........

The concept is to push the testicles up into the inguinal canal (their little "burrow"). The genitals are then pulled backwards and held in place with tight underwear and/or tape.

Second Google search.........

Drag queens use duct tape but be sure to shave first.

I find both to be very eye watering, esp. the duct tape, even on shaved skin. somehow there is no advive on how to remove it! Over the years I have found Marks & Spencers "Magic Pants" the solution. Ok, I agree not exactly "Victoria Secerts", but they do the job really well, and no pain. Hence last night the "nuts" went a wandering without them and got into no-mans land. A very painfull experience it was. The other solution is not to wear very tight clothing, as it helps hide, including a slightly large tummy as well. Over the years hormones also decrease the size of everything and this makes life so much easier.

I hope Santa is reading this, as I do need a few more pairs. Ho Ho Ho

Much easier for squirrels.

1 comment:

  1. They puts there nuts into my flowerpots. I see that each day. Sometimes there comes another squirrel and steel ist.